The door closed behind him, and Blue finally gave in to her compulsion to cry, hiding her sobs in the thick pillow and shaking with their intensity. She knew it wouldn't help much, squalling into a pillow, but she simply couldn't hold it in anymore. Every time she felt--or even anticipated--a touch upon her skin, his disgusting face swam in her vision, ruining any sort of pleasure or comfort which might be taken from just a simple gesture.
It was miserable. As tactile as their relationship was, Blue hated not being able to share that closeness with her mate. Oh, sometimes it was fine, she didn't think about the bad stuff and she could handle it. But other times, when it was soft, gentle and quiet, when there weren't any other distractions to pull her memory aside, that hated countenance swam before her, mocking, leering.
Blue pressed knuckles to her abdomen, against the twinging of a brand new scar, still shiny but thankfully fully healed. It made her stomach roil, nausea threatening, to even glance at the thought that the life she'd conceived very well might have been his. She gripped the pillow tighter, tips of talons piercing the white case. It wasn't enough.
Bolting up and to the bathroom, Blue fell to her knees on the cool tile, but thankfully managed not to wretch--there wasn't enough in her stomach to lose. But she shook with sobs and spasms, finally leaning her head on the edge of the bathtub, letting its coolness seep into her heated brain. Getting back up was a chore, but she did manage to wash her face and make it back to the slightly rumpled bed by the time she heard Omega rustling at the door.
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It was miserable. As tactile as their relationship was, Blue hated not being able to share that closeness with her mate. Oh, sometimes it was fine, she didn't think about the bad stuff and she could handle it. But other times, when it was soft, gentle and quiet, when there weren't any other distractions to pull her memory aside, that hated countenance swam before her, mocking, leering.
Blue pressed knuckles to her abdomen, against the twinging of a brand new scar, still shiny but thankfully fully healed. It made her stomach roil, nausea threatening, to even glance at the thought that the life she'd conceived very well might have been his. She gripped the pillow tighter, tips of talons piercing the white case. It wasn't enough.
Bolting up and to the bathroom, Blue fell to her knees on the cool tile, but thankfully managed not to wretch--there wasn't enough in her stomach to lose. But she shook with sobs and spasms, finally leaning her head on the edge of the bathtub, letting its coolness seep into her heated brain. Getting back up was a chore, but she did manage to wash her face and make it back to the slightly rumpled bed by the time she heard Omega rustling at the door.